I, like many of us, have been quick to criticize and slow to praise. It is easier to tear something down rather then build something up. And my recent adventures in home renovations have taught me precisely that. I am not sure why we do this as human beings? But I found myself doing it far more often then I wanted.

Over the past 6 months or so though I have been more proactive about praising more and criticizing less. I have found it immensely helpful to remind myself that while I may not agree with the decisions being made by others, that their hearts is in the right place. There are after all very few truly “evil” people in the world.

For instance, I may not agree with decisions my bishop makes, or votes taking in deanery council, but reminding myself that all these people want to see the Kingdom of God grow and are just doing their best has helped me temper my criticism.

What has also helped me temper my criticisms of others is reminding myself that it is easy to criticize, but then asking myself, “what am I going to do about it?” I can, after all, join in a “bitch” session, or I can be willing to help others and offer constructive solutions. This has helped me not just to be more effective in church land, but to be happier.

This, of course, is not just a realization I have had on my own or a moment of self actualization. It is born of a couple of things. It is a process by which I am becoming more the person God wants me to be. Allowing the Spirit of God to work me over has had a dramatic positive effect. Also, having good friends has been key. Not just too debrief and complain with but also challenge me to be a better priest, and a better person.

So a big shout out to Kevin Dixon and Bill Ward. You guys have helped make me a better person, at least 8 times out of 10. (sorry Billy, couldn’t resist)